It was Thursday, August 22, and I just sat down to a relaxing evening at home with your dad after working a full day and attending a committee meeting that evening. We were sitting on the sofa watching TV when I felt a trickle of water. I rushed to the bathroom and more came out. I was in denial at first, and your dad was trying to convince me that indeed my water had broken. I decided to wait and see what happened and more water just kept flowing so we called our doula Bianca.
She told us to get plenty of rest and call her in the morning. Your dad gave me a beautiful blessing that assured both of us that everything would go well with your delivery. I couldn't believe that you were going to come on your due date. I was so sure that you were going to be late.
Your dad finished packing our hospital bags and we went to sleep at about 10 p.m. I awoke at 2 a.m. feeling some regular contractions but they weren't painful. I let your dad sleep while I counted the contractions for the next 2 hours. I decided to go back to bed at 4 a.m. because I knew this was really about to happen and I would need all the rest I could get.
At 5 a.m., I woke up with the first strong contraction, and it felt like from then on they only got longer and stronger. Bianca arrived at about 9 a.m. and we labored at home for the next 5 hours. Those hours were very intense, but your dad stayed by my side every minute. He kept reassuring me that I was doing a great job and that you would be here soon and all the pain would be over.
I had planned to be active in labor...walking around, sitting on the birthing ball, leaning on something. But all of that went out the door because all I wanted to do was sit and recline. It was the most comfortable position for me. I did get in the bathtub twice but it felt like more of a hassle than anything. The things that I remember most from the experience is being extremely thirsty and feeling tremendous relief between contractions. It was also helping me during contractions to take deep breaths and count them. Most of them lasted about 10 breaths so I would know when I was halfway and almost done with the contraction.
They say that there is a transition stage in labor that indicates when you are getting closer. That time came at about 2 p.m. I started to get really frazzled and aggravated that we weren't at the hospital already. All I could think about was how there was no way I would make it to the hospital with as much pain as I was in. I didn't want to move from the couch, and I was sure that I would have to deliver you right there in our living room.
Bianca tried to check me to see how dilated I was but she couldn't tell because your head was in the way. But she said that it was time for us to decide if we were ready to go to the hospital. Absolutely! Your dad started to load everything in the car while I was trying to get dressed through the contractions. Looking back now I know I must have looked a hot mess with my pink nightie, black and white polka dot pajama pants and slippers.
Before we left I was asking myself why I decided to put myself through this pain and was reminded that it was the best thing for you. I told your dad that I wanted the epidural...I just couldn't take it anymore, but he reassured me that I was doing a great job.
Everyone said the drive to the hospital would be the worst but it really wasn't that bad. There was one time when your dad slammed on the brakes for a red light and I felt like you were just going to be thrown out of me but other than that it was a pretty smooth ride.
When we arrived, your dad ran in to get someone to help me and he left me with them while he went to park the car. I was terrified because I felt very alone all of a sudden, but as soon as the nurse wheeled me around I saw Bianca and felt immediate relief. She held my hand all the way to the labor and delivery floor. When we got there, they started asking me all these questions and made me sign all these papers. Ridiculous! Hello, I'm in intense labor people! I remember they asked me what my due date was and when I replied with "Today," everyone chuckled a bit.
When we toured the hospital months ago, I remember the rooms being so large and spacious. But they wheeled me into this tiny room that was soooo hot. They put a gown on me and put me in the bed. Everything was a whirlwind of senses and emotions. It sounds weird but I never even had the thought to mention pain meds or an epidural because I was just so concentrated on the pain itself.
Your dad arrived just before the nurse checked me. She said I was 5-6 cm, and I said "That's it!?" Bianca reassured me that that was a very good number...over halfway there. I was still feeling disappointed. Dr. Daigle came in about 30 minutes later and said that the nurse changed her mind and thought I was more like 7 cm. She checked me again and said that I had progressed to 8 cm and if I gave her a couple of strong pushes she was sure she could get me to 10 cm, which she did.
When she claimed "Alright, it's time to push," I was so relieved. I couldn't wait for you to be in our arms, and I couldn't wait for the pain to be over with. Little did I know that the pain was about to get 10 times worse and you would take a lot longer to arrive than we thought.
At the beginning of each contraction, I felt a strong urge to push and then I was directed to push two more times after that. Each time, everyone in the room was cheering me on and saying that I was so close. So each time I pushed I thought for sure you were going to come out. But you didn't. At one point, when everyone was saying "You're almost there," I yelled at them "Y'all keep saying that!" I felt like it was never going to end and I was starting to feel hopeless.
Each time I felt another contraction begin, I was sure that I wouldn't be able to push again because I was so completely exhausted. Your dad was on my right side and Bianca was on my left. Your dad kept whispering to me that I was doing such a good job and that he was so proud of me.
I have no idea how I made it through the next hour and 15 minutes pushing 3 times every other minute but somehow I did. Towards the end, your dad and Bianca started to lift my butt off the bed as I pulled my legs back and I could tell that you were making more progress descending. They asked me if I wanted a mirror so I could see you but I told them no because I didn't even have my glasses on so really I couldn't see anything. A couple pushes later they asked if I wanted to reach down and touch your head and I did. Everyone in the room was oohing and awing about how much hair you had. Your dad said at one point the doctor was actually styling it and that helped to relax him.
After I felt your head and knew how close you were, I felt a renewed strength and a couple pushes later your head was out and then the rest of your body. It was amazing relief as they placed you on my chest and your dad and I looked you over. But then the pain wasn't over as I began to get a cramp in my foot. I begged Bianca to massage it. I wanted to concentrate on you but the cramp was all I could think about. Thankfully it eventually went away.
The staff knew that we didn't want you whisked away and poked and prodded at so they looked you over as you laid on me. You were so incredibly alert, and I couldn't believe that I could finally stare into your big almond shaped eyes.
They weighed and measured you, and after about 30 minutes Bianca left and the staff slowly trickled out and there your parents were all alone with you for the first time. We were in shock and just overcome with joy. I'll never forget what your dad said to me that made me cry for the first time throughout the entire ordeal. One day I will tell you.
Porter Jonathan Turfitt
8.23.2013
7 lbs. 20 in.
